MY BABY IS TURNING EIGHTEEN

It’s hard to believe that my baby will be 18 this weekend, the time has just flown by and I don’t know where all those years have gone? When the Teen Techie was only a few weeks old, lots of people said to me “make the most of every moment, because before you know it he will be all grown up” and that is exactly what has happened. If I had that time all over again and knew then, what I know now. I would have trusted my own instinct more, not stressed so much about getting things done and stopped to enjoy those little moments more often.

Sadly, becoming pregnant was not as straight forward as we had first hoped and this is when I discovered I had PCOS, the lifelong companion who would try to take over my body. We fought hard with each other. But, after two long years of upset, an operation and lots of medication my battle had been one. I was finally pregnant and nothing was going to take that prize from me. This special little being inside me was nourished and nurtured getting the best of everything, to ensure the best possible start in life. The PCOS was now dormant and my body and soul was taken over by this fast growing baby inside me. Right from the very beginning he signalled that this pregnancy was going to be on his terms and would be anything other than straightforward. He was positioned upright instead of upside down and was facing outward instead of inwards. Ever since he has always had his feet firmly planted on the ground and always facing forward ready, not wanting to miss anything. Eventually, with several weeks to spare and after lots of prodding and poking by two sonographers with ultra sound wands, he was in the correct position for entry into the world. Very comfortable in his new position, he seemed to be settling in for the duration and was not happy to be forced out by inducement a few weeks later. Exhausted, after many hours of resisting delivery. He was forced into the world on 9th September 1999, while still sound asleep.

Right from day one he did not follow the routine that we had been led to expect. He would not sleep during the day, but slept all night. He was not interested in breast feeding, as the supply would not come fast enough and restricted his ability to see what was happening around him. Thankfully, he happily accepted the bottle and became a brilliant eater. Who, transitioned easily to solids and loved to feed himself. Eventually, he accepted that a nap during the day was beneficial for him and stopped resisting a day time sleep. Which, thankfully did not hinder his ability to sleep right through the night.

baby eating

Since separating from his father at just six months old. Together we have weathered some traumatic events in our lives and managed to come through it ok. Thinking back, it was the strong bond that we built while weathering these storms that held us together when the hormones hit around age 12 and we entered those terrible teenage years. Yes, we have locked horns and there has been lots of door slamming and stamping of feet. However, as we are fast approach the Teen Techie’s 18th birthday on the weekend. I can thankfully say that we have still managed to have a wonderful relationship that we both cherish.

In the last six months, the change from teen to young adult is very noticeable. We can now have civil conversations about what is happening around the world and our futures. As he prepares to vote in the upcoming nationwide elections, there have been some interesting discussions about politics. With the focus on helping him come to his own conclusions, rather than automatically following our preferences. Yes, I know that there will still be times when we lock horns over a variety of things. Especially, when he starts university next year and will have to manage his need for independence, while still respecting the rules that have been set for our home. I sure hope that this time next year, I can report back that we still have a wonderful relationship.

Jenni XXX

  • Alicia-OneMotherHen

    Oh happy birthday to your little (big) man! They do grow up so fast x

    • Thanks Alicia, & yes he sure has shot up fast. He’s coming up 6ft3, with size 13 feet & no sign of the growth slowing anytime soon.

  • Look at the number of 9s in his birthdate!1 Wow. We have an eighteen year old granddaughter born a little earlier in May. She got to vote for the first time last week in local council elections. It sounds like you have so made every moment count as you could in becoming Mama to your son. Good on you! Thanks for joining in #LTW 35/52, next week is Taking Stock. I have added the prompts for the rest of 2017 on my home page and in the blog post P is for Pansies.

    • On his birthday we took him to the local gastro pub for lunch and his first legal pint & while chatting about he last 18yrs, he stated that it was the time spend doing the small stuff with him has been most memorable. This was a tearful proud mum moment, that confirmed what a wonderful young man he has become.

  • LydiaCLee

    It’s interesting the teen dynamic. It’s harder than you ever imagined but those moments when you bond seem so wonderful…

    • It sure is an interesting dynamic & i’ve found that they need so much more of you than when they were at the end of their primary school years.

  • Your story to pregnancy is very similar to mine – struggles with PCOS, the drugs, the ops, & finally – a month before I was going to start IVF – the long awaited pregnancy. My baby is now 19 & I have savoured every single day & every single stage. happy birthday to your boy. #TeamLovinLife

    • What an uncanny coincidence about our pregnancies. Going through all that we did to get our babies, i’m sure is why we never take our role as parents for granted.

      • absolutely. It’s so so so precious…

  • The baby and child years fly past all too fast. My twins are 17 approaching 18 and I sometimes look at them in wonder thinking how did you get so big and grown up so quick!

    Ingrid
    http://www.fabulousandfunlife.blogspot.com.au

    • They sure do Ingrid, sometimes I wish I could have those years all over again, but this time round with the wisdom that i’ve already gained.

  • It sounds like you’ve got a good relationship and I’m sure you’ll only build on that as the years go by. I hope the celebrations go well! #teamlovinlife

  • writeofthemiddle

    Happy 18th birthday to your boy/man and congratulations to you for surviving the 18 years and doing a great job in raising a human! My youngest is now 22. It’s hard to believe. I do miss the little versions of my kids but I love the sleep I get now! lol #TeamLovinLife

    • I sure know what you mean about missing the younger version, but without the very early wake up calls.

  • What a milestone … and you are right, the years go by too fast. At the time it feels like forever but you blink and they’re grown and flying the nest! I have a 23 y.o. still at home (uni student) and Miss Almost 21 moved out within weeks of her 18th birthday, she always had a fiercely independent streak. It’s funny how you mentioned the way your Mr 18 came into the world and that’s what he’s like to this day – my kids were the same. Mr 23 came into the world quiet and wide eyed, just taking it all in. Miss Almost 21 came into the world screaming and kicking up a stink – always the Drama Queen!!!!

  • sydneyshopgirl

    Jenni
    Thank you for writing so beautifully and from the heart about raising your gorgeous son on your own through so many challenges. I am only at the beginning of the same adventure. It gave me warm feelings when you describe how strong your bond is from thriving together through everything that has happened in your lives.
    Much love

    SSG xxx

    • Thank you so much for your kind words, its great to read that you have gained something from my post. Just by seeing your journey as an adventure, you are already making the most of your current situation. If you would like to chat more, please feel free to direct message me to [email protected]

  • My baby turns 18 next week too!!! It’s a big time … for all of us. #teamlovinlife